This man is a father of a couple of kids at one of the schools I teach at. He has been leaving me unwanted notes and gifts on and in my car, about 5 times since the end of February. How he knows my car I don't know. How he found my car parked at my apartment, I have no idea! He obviously knows where I live which is creepy since he is from another town. I am so glad I live in a very busy and public part of town!
I have asked him to stop. I told him I am not interested and that I have a boyfriend and I received another note yesterday and that was the final straw for me. I didn't want to go to the police but the few friends and my mom (who I just told on Monday) I did tell about the situation thought it would be a good precautionary detail.
The police said they can call him if I find out a few more details (I don't know his first name, or his license number), but they think I should tell him to stop once more the next time I speak to him in person and mention that I will go to the police if he does not.
Not a fun situation especially since it is kind of involving my work. I haven't spoken to the principal at the school at all since I am hoping it will end on it's own. It's just really awkward and I wish it wasn't happening!
That does sound scary. I really think you should tell the principal, as he will likely be involved eventually.
ReplyDeleteTell the principal what's going on, and contact the police from the school telling them that you want to see them at the school (principal will have his name/addr if you know who he is the parent of) and have them deal with it. He may have been following around other teachers, so definitely tell the principal. He or she needs to be aware of what's going on in relation to the school. Sounds like this man is stalking you if he knows where you live and it likely won't "end on it's own" - it may escalate. You should not put yourself in potential danger to tell him, again, to leave you alone. Be insistent with the police that they see you, see him and deal with it. Absolutely DO NOT be embarrassed about this - it's not your fault and there's no need to feel badly about it!
ReplyDeleteIf you see him again before the police see you, then tell him that you've already notified the police and he will be getting a visit from them. He needs to be made aware that what he's doing is NOT WELCOME and absolutely not appropriate. There's a lot of whackos out there, and you don't want to be victimized.
ReplyDeleteVery scary. Be sure to document everything...times dates words exchanged etc. Take pics of any stuff he leaves you. If you have a good relationship with that principal you really should let her/him know.
ReplyDeleteI am a teacher as well. Inform your principal, as they can often be one of the main points of contact if someone enters the school, and get in contact with your provincial teachers association. They should be able to provide with guidance.
ReplyDeleteWow that sounds really scary! Like others said, make sure you document and record everything.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely document and tell the principal. Your school should know not to allow him in your classroom and to be aware so that if you need assistance they take it seriously. I'm glad you went to the police. Be safe!
ReplyDeleteDocument everything as LBC teacher said. This is scary, and I hope he leaves you alone. I can't believe he knows where you live. That alone would make me nervous. Keep us posted!
ReplyDeleteWow that's really creepy and definitely unacceptable! I echo everything that's already been said above - inform your principal, contact the police if he leaves you notes or gifts again. You're definitely right in going to the police!
ReplyDeleteYikes, really creepy! I had to file a police report and eventually a restraining order against my ex for stalking me a few years ago, and it was very unpleasant. However, it worked. Something about disinterested third parties telling him "LEAVE HER ALONE" got a message through to him that my saying it just couldn't do.
ReplyDeleteHave you read The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker? I really recommend it. If you want to talk about it, feel free to email me.
I second what everyone else has written - your employer should be informed.
ReplyDeleteStay strong.
Follow everyone's advice. Don't let it shake you to much and be careful. Informing the police was the correct choice.
ReplyDeleteFollow all advice and keep safe......
ReplyDeleteI agree you should speak to your principal. Hopefully this guy will just give up and move, but I would expect the police to act once they do find out who he is.
ReplyDeleteI agree with everything people have told you. You must tell the principal and the teachers association. There are some VERY disturbed people out there and he needs to be dealt with seriously. Do not feel embarassed or that it is awkward. It is not your behaviour that is inappropriate.
ReplyDeleteDocument his behaviour and save the notes and "gifts". Do not be afraid to press charges. The polite approach does not seem to register with this guy.
Keep smart and safe!